The other day I was discussing kolel with a friend of mine (the one who irked me into writing the Another Rant post). Well anyway, I know many of you would recommend I seek new friends (I recommend it to myself each morning), but the problem is, I live in the past. She used to be such a good friend, she was so smart, and we used to mess with our teachers together.
I remember once one of our teachers was discussing the importance of minhaggim. The teacher said " Ashkenazie do not eat kitniyos on pesach, because in Europe these things weren't readily available for the Ashkenazie community. Even though these things are available now, and we're so diverse, it is still important to keep the minhaggim, because they represent who you are. " The lecture continued, and the teacher said something bizarre (can't remember what), and so this freind was like :
"now, lets say my grandfather lived in an area that had bug infestations every summer, and so going to shul was not an option on shabbos, because it was inevitible that he step on a bug, does that mean that now, for a few months each year I should not go to shul on shabbos?"
My teacher was like "well no, because now you don't have the bugs!"
So my freind was like "and now we know about kitniyos"
The teacher got ticked, came back the next day with a passuk that said something we already heard, and life continued in its usual routine way. My friend and I were so compatible. Always with our smart-a** remarks annoying the teachers. Both of us were frum. We read alot, we spoke to alot of people, we compared notes, and overall we got along. Then she went to seminary...
OMG! You know how frummies tell you you shouldn't watch TV because it brainwashes you? And because there are subliminal messages in the shows and commericals and stuff similar to that? Well I truly believe that frummies just fear their own methods of subliminal messaging will not work in contrast to the multi-million dollar budgets of the fancy ad agencies.
This friend, is now a pain. She takes everything she hears literally. She constantly quotes pirkei avos, and other things, and never makes a freakin decision without asking "advice" first (from the Rebbeim or their wives). Its like if she were stuck in an elevator she'd prob call the Rav first and ask if she should press the emergency button.
Anyway, we were discussing Kollel and welfare. I told my friend that if a telemarketer calls and asks for tzedakeh, my parents always ask if the organizations gives to kollel families. If they do, my parents don't give them money. Then I said that it really sucks to have your money taken away (in the form of taxes) and given to people who are smart, and perfectly capable of getting their butts up and working. Instead they think they run the world by "learning" Torah. I gave her a whole speech about the time-zone thing, and how Hashem created the world with time zones so that there's always Torah learning going on, and I gave her a whole thing on how Adam's punishment was to work from the sweat of his brow. And then she goes..."well, I'd much rather be paying kollel guys with my taxes than black guys."
Wow did I get mad at her. Am I the only one that doesn't see that comparison as plausible, considering the Jews constantly claim to be "better then the goyim" or "chosen"? If we're "better" or "chosen" why the hell would we be ok with giving one of our, perfectly able-bodied kind, charity, then giving another? Shouldn't it be that we lead by example? That WE work, and they get their butts up because they'll be like "Look at the Jews, maybe we should work too?"
This really bothers me. Maybe, if we really are "the light unto other nations" and weren't cheating in taxes, and weren't hiring illegal immigrants, and weren't only getting married by chupa (but civil weddings as well) maybe then the goyim WOULDN"t be cheating as well...but I dunno... how would we ever know? We keep justifying our actions by saying "well, the blacks are on welfare, why can't the kollel guys, or the chassidish guys with 15 children be on it too?"
I'll tell you why...because its wrong. I'm not one to promote welfare, and I hate the idea of it, but I'm not naive enough to think it'll ever leave. The people on it, should be on it because they DESERVE it (temporary setbacks- unemployment, injury, unexpected death of supporter, etc).
I was also reading other blogs on the Rubashkin issue, and one person said "who cares, goyim don't treat their employees well either."
Well... thanx for the news. Next time I go out wearing a short mini-skirt a low-cut blouse, eating a cheeseburger, and you tell me "the torah doesn't allow it" I'll reply "well, the goyim do it too." Try answering me!
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Monday, May 26, 2008
Nerd Article
This is the Nerd Article I mentioned in my post "Speak English" that I had written for my school newspaper. I remembered it being better, but I figured I'd share it anyway.
Why the Educational System is Failing
Every person strives to be the best that they can be. They want to be as smart as Einstein, play as well as Jordan, and skate as well as Sara Hughes. Einstein, Jordan and Hughes are role models for such people. Not just anyone can be Jordan, or Einstein or Hughes.
If a girl is trying out for the nationals in figure skating, and she wins with straight 6.0's, everyone would chant her name. If the girl came in sixth or seventh place no one would chant her name, because that shows she doesn't deserve the praise. If people did chant her name, no one would try hard at the sport. It takes skill and talent, and if you get applauded, and you weren't even on the podium why would you bother? If the complements and the applause come without the strive, you wouldn't strive anymore, it wouldn't be worth it. It's plain and simple human nature. The problem with the educational system is just that, the fact no one needs to strive for anything anymore, they just get applauded and complimented for doing their silly stupid things.
A few weeks ago one of my friends used the word "nerd" to describe girls cutting school. A nerd is smart, single-minded and accomplished. One that cuts school is the exact opposite. However, these girls that cut school just got nerds, so what more is there to strive for? Of course they don't want to go to school, if they're being called nerds for not coming. Why should they go, aren't they smart enough already? If they're not, they are told they are. Haven't they accomplished already? But he girls haven't accomplished anything. They weren't smart, and to cut school is not an act of a single-minded person, its usually an act of a person that can't think with their own mind.
Since the Jewish people make up the world and what they do influences the goyim then it's the fault of the Jews that the worlds education is falling apart. If they can't keep their own kids striving, how could the goyim do it to their kids? It's the misuse of words like "nerd" that cause such problems. To give another example of this outrageous misuse of the English language leading to messed up society, think about how English is spoken in our school (a wannabe good school). In real English you would say, "I don't want to go to the store either" in our school you would say "I don't either want to go to the store." Once a Jew does something wrong it's a chain reaction, it leads to all nations. Speaking incorrectly leads to them, and eventually no one is literate anymore, and poof...President GW Bush can't speak English! So don't blame bad Public Schools on the government, blame the bad public schools on your classmates. Government cannot do anything without Hashems chosen people acting chosen (speaking properly).
SO GO SMACK SOME OF YOUR CLASSMATES TODAY! IT'LL MAKE THE WORLD A MORE EDUCATED PLACE!
** The last action was not meant to be taken literally **
Why the Educational System is Failing
Every person strives to be the best that they can be. They want to be as smart as Einstein, play as well as Jordan, and skate as well as Sara Hughes. Einstein, Jordan and Hughes are role models for such people. Not just anyone can be Jordan, or Einstein or Hughes.
If a girl is trying out for the nationals in figure skating, and she wins with straight 6.0's, everyone would chant her name. If the girl came in sixth or seventh place no one would chant her name, because that shows she doesn't deserve the praise. If people did chant her name, no one would try hard at the sport. It takes skill and talent, and if you get applauded, and you weren't even on the podium why would you bother? If the complements and the applause come without the strive, you wouldn't strive anymore, it wouldn't be worth it. It's plain and simple human nature. The problem with the educational system is just that, the fact no one needs to strive for anything anymore, they just get applauded and complimented for doing their silly stupid things.
A few weeks ago one of my friends used the word "nerd" to describe girls cutting school. A nerd is smart, single-minded and accomplished. One that cuts school is the exact opposite. However, these girls that cut school just got nerds, so what more is there to strive for? Of course they don't want to go to school, if they're being called nerds for not coming. Why should they go, aren't they smart enough already? If they're not, they are told they are. Haven't they accomplished already? But he girls haven't accomplished anything. They weren't smart, and to cut school is not an act of a single-minded person, its usually an act of a person that can't think with their own mind.
Since the Jewish people make up the world and what they do influences the goyim then it's the fault of the Jews that the worlds education is falling apart. If they can't keep their own kids striving, how could the goyim do it to their kids? It's the misuse of words like "nerd" that cause such problems. To give another example of this outrageous misuse of the English language leading to messed up society, think about how English is spoken in our school (a wannabe good school). In real English you would say, "I don't want to go to the store either" in our school you would say "I don't either want to go to the store." Once a Jew does something wrong it's a chain reaction, it leads to all nations. Speaking incorrectly leads to them, and eventually no one is literate anymore, and poof...President GW Bush can't speak English! So don't blame bad Public Schools on the government, blame the bad public schools on your classmates. Government cannot do anything without Hashems chosen people acting chosen (speaking properly).
SO GO SMACK SOME OF YOUR CLASSMATES TODAY! IT'LL MAKE THE WORLD A MORE EDUCATED PLACE!
** The last action was not meant to be taken literally **
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
The English teacher conspiracy theory
The following was written by my sister, who apparently had way to much to drink before writing her english essay on Great Expectations. :-). Enjoy! Please comment, as she is so excited by this. I told her to start her own "anti-English teacher blog" but she decided she didn't feel like it- afterall- if you knew my sister, she'd much rather just be watching TV and eating chips- while she complains about how dumb the teachers are on TV- and then compares them with her teachers in school!
Hundreds of years ago, before the evil existed was a group of people more commonly known as "the losers." They were incapable of doing anything with there lives; they lacked in logic, creativity and in memorization skills and were therefore unable to have any jobs. They decided to make a convention which they called "The Loser Convention."
The convention was established. Together they decided that they needed to think of a way to manipulate society into thinking "The Losers" were valuable members. They came up with a curriculum on analyzing literature in terms of symbolism and characterization and all other forms of brainless activity. They called this curriculum language arts.
The question was, how would they get society to believe such a load of baloney? They thought about it and came up with the "Big Lie Technique." These losers used the idea of "persistence" to get what they wanted; they were constantly annoying people with their loser stupid ideas, and after a while, their ideas started gaining acceptance and "language arts" became a new subject in the towns curriculum. Over the years this subject was more and more accepted and eventually became a mandatory class in all schools. Sadly many people were lost to this horrible conspiracy.
I thought I'd let you in on the secret, these "losers" are our modern day English teachers. I thought it was only fair to warn you, that you should not believe all the trash English teachers tell you. If an author describes a hill as "smokey" it is probably because he felt like it. He's an author and he's entitled to write whatever the hell he wants. If he wanted the town to be smokey, its because he wanted it to be smokey. It's a rather clear concept.
When teaching Dickens, it is obvious that English teachers forget that he was paid per WORD. So when he describes a scene, there most likely isn't any symbolism, or any clear, specific images he was trying to portray. HE WAS TRYING TO GET CASH!! -especially in his later works for example Great Expectations-
When teachers discuss why Dickens created that atmosphere or why he made that certain scene lengthy its not because there is a meaning behind it, but is because he had other motives-CASH!
So next time you hear about someone saying..."OMG I'm so good in English" you know that they really mean "OMG I suck at everything! :-( I guess i must fall back on this loser-ish pile of garbage known as language arts".
(The loser convention was later changed to the ELA part of the board of education- and if you ask any English teacher, how much you wanna bet they won't tell you that the subject was started by a bunch of losers with no skills who decided to manipulate people into believing in their retarded cause).
Hundreds of years ago, before the evil existed was a group of people more commonly known as "the losers." They were incapable of doing anything with there lives; they lacked in logic, creativity and in memorization skills and were therefore unable to have any jobs. They decided to make a convention which they called "The Loser Convention."
The convention was established. Together they decided that they needed to think of a way to manipulate society into thinking "The Losers" were valuable members. They came up with a curriculum on analyzing literature in terms of symbolism and characterization and all other forms of brainless activity. They called this curriculum language arts.
The question was, how would they get society to believe such a load of baloney? They thought about it and came up with the "Big Lie Technique." These losers used the idea of "persistence" to get what they wanted; they were constantly annoying people with their loser stupid ideas, and after a while, their ideas started gaining acceptance and "language arts" became a new subject in the towns curriculum. Over the years this subject was more and more accepted and eventually became a mandatory class in all schools. Sadly many people were lost to this horrible conspiracy.
I thought I'd let you in on the secret, these "losers" are our modern day English teachers. I thought it was only fair to warn you, that you should not believe all the trash English teachers tell you. If an author describes a hill as "smokey" it is probably because he felt like it. He's an author and he's entitled to write whatever the hell he wants. If he wanted the town to be smokey, its because he wanted it to be smokey. It's a rather clear concept.
When teaching Dickens, it is obvious that English teachers forget that he was paid per WORD. So when he describes a scene, there most likely isn't any symbolism, or any clear, specific images he was trying to portray. HE WAS TRYING TO GET CASH!! -especially in his later works for example Great Expectations-
When teachers discuss why Dickens created that atmosphere or why he made that certain scene lengthy its not because there is a meaning behind it, but is because he had other motives-CASH!
So next time you hear about someone saying..."OMG I'm so good in English" you know that they really mean "OMG I suck at everything! :-( I guess i must fall back on this loser-ish pile of garbage known as language arts".
(The loser convention was later changed to the ELA part of the board of education- and if you ask any English teacher, how much you wanna bet they won't tell you that the subject was started by a bunch of losers with no skills who decided to manipulate people into believing in their retarded cause).
Monday, May 19, 2008
Bison
Frum people never fail to amaze me. A few weeks ago my family was at someones house for shabbos. These people are the "typical" frummy BY/Yeshivishe types. Anyway, they were discussing Bison meat, which is now all the rage. Its leaner and apparently the original meat of America (or whatever that commercial says). So these people tell my mom "OMG! you should go and try bison at restuarant (don't remember the name), it's amazing."
My mom goes "really, I never tried Bison, what do they do with it at restuarant?"
They're like "Chilli"
Wow! OMG...as if that isn't the BEST way for someone to try a NEW meat, but to eat it in a chili...brilliant frum people.
I couldn't resist telling this story. I have finals now, so I thought of something short to post.
Gotta love 'em frum people. Their logic is absolutely flawless, and the mastercard commercial should say something like:
"Bison meat for chulent- $8"
"A variety of Kugel- $15"
" Listening to people rave about how they loved bison (by eating it in your chulent)- Priceless"
My mom goes "really, I never tried Bison, what do they do with it at restuarant?"
They're like "Chilli"
Wow! OMG...as if that isn't the BEST way for someone to try a NEW meat, but to eat it in a chili...brilliant frum people.
I couldn't resist telling this story. I have finals now, so I thought of something short to post.
Gotta love 'em frum people. Their logic is absolutely flawless, and the mastercard commercial should say something like:
"Bison meat for chulent- $8"
"A variety of Kugel- $15"
" Listening to people rave about how they loved bison (by eating it in your chulent)- Priceless"
Friday, May 16, 2008
The Forbes article
This is the Forbes article I had mentioned to The Babysitter in response to one of her comments on my "From the modern person's perspective..."
This isn't exactly what she mentioned, as in this doesn't discuss sweatshops nor does the article discuss Wal-Mart, but it does discuss the fact that child-labor is something we cannot rid, and that the US is trying to find ways to protect kids.
I don't know if I read it in this article, but I read somewhere that if the Indian's or Mexicans, or other 3rd world-country citizens would be paid the same wages as we were, it would be as if we're sending kids to the candy shop with a credit card..they wouldn't be able to handle it. They have a certain standard of living.
Anyway, I am looking for a paper I wrote on wal-mart, I also mentioned it, to post how wal-mart is not that bad.
This isn't exactly what she mentioned, as in this doesn't discuss sweatshops nor does the article discuss Wal-Mart, but it does discuss the fact that child-labor is something we cannot rid, and that the US is trying to find ways to protect kids.
I don't know if I read it in this article, but I read somewhere that if the Indian's or Mexicans, or other 3rd world-country citizens would be paid the same wages as we were, it would be as if we're sending kids to the candy shop with a credit card..they wouldn't be able to handle it. They have a certain standard of living.
Anyway, I am looking for a paper I wrote on wal-mart, I also mentioned it, to post how wal-mart is not that bad.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
From the modern person's perspective...
You know how frummies constantly bash things not-so-frummy people do, or rather not do? Like when they say "Well, they eat gebrakts" with this disgusted look, as if you're on the level of a convicted criminal. Well, its about time (well, actually lately its been a norm) that frummies are actually the criminals.
Today I received a call from a family friend who is frum. She wanted to know if I heard about what happened at the Rubashkin plant in Iowa, after I told her I didn't she was like "well, this is blog material for you, and she told me all about the occurrence.
So anyway, I would just like to say how disgusting that is. It is so wrong that these frum Jews are probably the typical "holier-than-thou" type when it comes to Jewish law, but when it comes to the "law of the land" thing, which is also very important, they don't care. They tend to ignore the fact that its a huge chillul hashem to hire so many illegal immigrants, and help them hide their illegal status, by using fraudulent social security numbers.
Hmm...lemme play their game.. It isn't that girls dress untzniously that causes terrorist attacks, but rather its the ridiculous amount of cases that have been coming up lately which reflect very badly on the Jewish community (ie sex solicitation, money embezzelment, molestation by Rabbi's)... well...that kind of speaks out alot more than if the girl dresses untzniously, and it sure
bothers alot more people.
So while I do not believe that we really know anything about why there are terrorist attacks in Israel, I think its "fun" (for lack of a better not-so convoluted word) to blame frummies for once for causing the terrorist attacks!
Today I received a call from a family friend who is frum. She wanted to know if I heard about what happened at the Rubashkin plant in Iowa, after I told her I didn't she was like "well, this is blog material for you, and she told me all about the occurrence.
So anyway, I would just like to say how disgusting that is. It is so wrong that these frum Jews are probably the typical "holier-than-thou" type when it comes to Jewish law, but when it comes to the "law of the land" thing, which is also very important, they don't care. They tend to ignore the fact that its a huge chillul hashem to hire so many illegal immigrants, and help them hide their illegal status, by using fraudulent social security numbers.
Hmm...lemme play their game.. It isn't that girls dress untzniously that causes terrorist attacks, but rather its the ridiculous amount of cases that have been coming up lately which reflect very badly on the Jewish community (ie sex solicitation, money embezzelment, molestation by Rabbi's)... well...that kind of speaks out alot more than if the girl dresses untzniously, and it sure
bothers alot more people.
So while I do not believe that we really know anything about why there are terrorist attacks in Israel, I think its "fun" (for lack of a better not-so convoluted word) to blame frummies for once for causing the terrorist attacks!
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Smartest thing in the Yated!
The following is a letter to the editor in the Readers Write forum in the Yated. It is by far one of the smartest things I've ever seen written in that column. I have no time to add any personal comments.
Anyway, enjoy:
Plastic Tablecloths and Stacking Dishes
Dear Editor,
Much has been said already about the shidduch crisis we are currently facing. It has been suggested that the bochurim these days are "marrying the wrong wife" by marrying girls who are younger than them. The undeniable truth, however, is that the Gemara teaches us that before a child is born, a bas kol declares that "So-and-So's daughter will marry So-and-So." The Gemara does not say, "So-and-So's son will marry So-and-So." The reason for this is because at the time of the birth of a boy, his wife has usually not been born yet. Thus, at the time of the boy's birth his wife's name cannot be proclaimed. It is only upon the birth of the girl, in which case the husband has usually been born already, that the bas kol can call out the name of the husband. Thus we see that the boy is usually older than the girl.
Secondly, we cannot argue with the otehr lesson of this Gemara, namely that a person's wife is predetermined from Heaven. It would seem nothing short of blesphemy to claim that all or most bochurim, by marrying "too young," are not marrying their beshert. Is the Eibishter not doing His job? Can we even claim to be able to "pick up the slack" (so to speak)?
Thirdly, the claims that there are too many girls being born, or too few boys, is likewise ridiculous, because it is impossible to calculate all the Jewish communities both in the New York City area and beyond it, inlcuding England, Australia, etc. Can we deny the fact that many bochurim marry out-of-towners and out-of-countryers? Can it be suggested that Eibishter is making too many Yidden, chas veshalom, for Him to marry off?
Isn't that what is really being said?
So, you're asking, why, then, are there so many unmarried boys and girls in the frum yeshiva community?
The answer can be found- and you can verify this for yourself- in the reasons people give for turning down shidduchim or not even considering them in the first place. Questions about whether people are "stackers" or "scrapers" are determining the marraiges in our community. And the questions get even more outrageous than that! The absurdity and true insignificance of these factors do not require elaboration.
In addition, many bochurim and bachuros unfortunately do not have anyone to turn to for advice. Instead, they turn to their friends and colleagues who-sorry to say- really know from nothing when compared to a rov or rebbe who has helped hundreds or thousands of bochurim and girls. These freinds, in contrast, offere counsel based on their minimal life experiences, which is exactly that- extremely limited, and ruin many shidduchim.
Bochurim during their high school years must be told that they need to acquire a rebbe for life, someone who they will be in contact with for many years to come, guiding them through life's challenges. In addition, this will give them a clear mehalech hachayim that is not just a self-made one combined from many other mehalchim from the various yeshivos he attended. When a bochur comes back from learning in Eretz Yisroel and goes to Lakewood, it is really too late at this point to begin finding a rebbi.
With proper reevaluation, we can hope to dance at many more happy chasunos this year. Amein.
Sruli Gross
Anyway, enjoy:
Plastic Tablecloths and Stacking Dishes
Dear Editor,
Much has been said already about the shidduch crisis we are currently facing. It has been suggested that the bochurim these days are "marrying the wrong wife" by marrying girls who are younger than them. The undeniable truth, however, is that the Gemara teaches us that before a child is born, a bas kol declares that "So-and-So's daughter will marry So-and-So." The Gemara does not say, "So-and-So's son will marry So-and-So." The reason for this is because at the time of the birth of a boy, his wife has usually not been born yet. Thus, at the time of the boy's birth his wife's name cannot be proclaimed. It is only upon the birth of the girl, in which case the husband has usually been born already, that the bas kol can call out the name of the husband. Thus we see that the boy is usually older than the girl.
Secondly, we cannot argue with the otehr lesson of this Gemara, namely that a person's wife is predetermined from Heaven. It would seem nothing short of blesphemy to claim that all or most bochurim, by marrying "too young," are not marrying their beshert. Is the Eibishter not doing His job? Can we even claim to be able to "pick up the slack" (so to speak)?
Thirdly, the claims that there are too many girls being born, or too few boys, is likewise ridiculous, because it is impossible to calculate all the Jewish communities both in the New York City area and beyond it, inlcuding England, Australia, etc. Can we deny the fact that many bochurim marry out-of-towners and out-of-countryers? Can it be suggested that Eibishter is making too many Yidden, chas veshalom, for Him to marry off?
Isn't that what is really being said?
So, you're asking, why, then, are there so many unmarried boys and girls in the frum yeshiva community?
The answer can be found- and you can verify this for yourself- in the reasons people give for turning down shidduchim or not even considering them in the first place. Questions about whether people are "stackers" or "scrapers" are determining the marraiges in our community. And the questions get even more outrageous than that! The absurdity and true insignificance of these factors do not require elaboration.
In addition, many bochurim and bachuros unfortunately do not have anyone to turn to for advice. Instead, they turn to their friends and colleagues who-sorry to say- really know from nothing when compared to a rov or rebbe who has helped hundreds or thousands of bochurim and girls. These freinds, in contrast, offere counsel based on their minimal life experiences, which is exactly that- extremely limited, and ruin many shidduchim.
Bochurim during their high school years must be told that they need to acquire a rebbe for life, someone who they will be in contact with for many years to come, guiding them through life's challenges. In addition, this will give them a clear mehalech hachayim that is not just a self-made one combined from many other mehalchim from the various yeshivos he attended. When a bochur comes back from learning in Eretz Yisroel and goes to Lakewood, it is really too late at this point to begin finding a rebbi.
With proper reevaluation, we can hope to dance at many more happy chasunos this year. Amein.
Sruli Gross
Friday, May 9, 2008
Mothers Day
It drives me banana's when frummies say they're anti-mother's day, or anti-father's day, or whatever other day there is that they're anti (there's plenty of them, I can go on for pages!).
What's wrong with celebrating mother's day? There are things that goyim come up with, that are actually good ideas -*gasp*- Hallmark made it up? Maybe, so who cares? The economy isn't at its greatest, why not take advantage of a "silly" holiday as a way to encourage money circulation?
But really, I love my mommy, and I love my daddy. As much as I should be "honoring" and "fearing" them, I really don't. I mean, I'm totally respectful. My mom is literally on call 24/6, and she's tired all the time, and my father is well... an interesting character. I help my mom clean, I cook, I do most of the laundry (not lately, this semester has been killer), and I stay up late talking to her and whatever else if she wants me to. Generally my family is very close. Yet still, why not have a day specifically where my mom gets to choose what we eat (as opposed to Benny's which we go to allll the time)?
I remember once in my HS the class made an attempt at an official debate. We split up in two teams, we did some research, came back the next day and argued. Somehow we went off topic (duh- this is my wacko HS we're talking about!) and we ended up discussing mother's day. So one girl on the opposing team was like "You don't need a day to honor your mother, you should be doing it everyday. It's so fake to set aside one day"
So I remember VERY quickly stating "Yea, so the 10 days between Rosh Hoshanah and Yom Kippur are fake?"
Boy was she stumped... hehe. And the teacher (obviously on her side) had nothing to say either.
I remember the one thing in HS that I enjoyed was messing with the teachers. :)
Happy Mothers Day to those of you who are mothers, and CHILDREN- be good! :)
What's wrong with celebrating mother's day? There are things that goyim come up with, that are actually good ideas -*gasp*- Hallmark made it up? Maybe, so who cares? The economy isn't at its greatest, why not take advantage of a "silly" holiday as a way to encourage money circulation?
But really, I love my mommy, and I love my daddy. As much as I should be "honoring" and "fearing" them, I really don't. I mean, I'm totally respectful. My mom is literally on call 24/6, and she's tired all the time, and my father is well... an interesting character. I help my mom clean, I cook, I do most of the laundry (not lately, this semester has been killer), and I stay up late talking to her and whatever else if she wants me to. Generally my family is very close. Yet still, why not have a day specifically where my mom gets to choose what we eat (as opposed to Benny's which we go to allll the time)?
I remember once in my HS the class made an attempt at an official debate. We split up in two teams, we did some research, came back the next day and argued. Somehow we went off topic (duh- this is my wacko HS we're talking about!) and we ended up discussing mother's day. So one girl on the opposing team was like "You don't need a day to honor your mother, you should be doing it everyday. It's so fake to set aside one day"
So I remember VERY quickly stating "Yea, so the 10 days between Rosh Hoshanah and Yom Kippur are fake?"
Boy was she stumped... hehe. And the teacher (obviously on her side) had nothing to say either.
I remember the one thing in HS that I enjoyed was messing with the teachers. :)
Happy Mothers Day to those of you who are mothers, and CHILDREN- be good! :)
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
Setting non-shomer people up
I was in a kiruv program at HS (I believe I mentioned this before) that was part of a "regular" all girls school. The program was very small, and we became extremely close to many of our teachers. To this day I keep in touch with three of them.
Anyway, because we were so close, we used to go into long conversations about our families, and how they reacted when we decided to become frum and so on. So one day, I mentioned my uncle, who at the time was about 25. He had just broken an engagment with a shiksa the year before, and so at the time -after he went on birthright, and had decided he only wanted to marry a Jewish girl, I took it as a 'project' to find him someone (I was like 14, and 25 seemed old to me!). So when I mentioned this, I was like "OMG, Mrs., you're very into kiruv, your husband works with a lot of BT guys, which means he meets their families. So he probably knows their sisters, cousins and relatives that may not be frum, but want a Jewish guy."
So she was like "yes, we know a few girls, plus we know of many girls generally."
So I was like "OMG!!! You should totally look for someone for my uncle! He is very smart and good-looking. He's laid back! Come on Mrs. F, you must no someone!"
And so, I expected her to say something like "well, I'll keep him in mind" but what I got was totally unexpected ...
"Well, I would keep him in mind, but since he is not religious, then he is not shomer, and our policy is not to set up people who aren't religious because they may break the laws of shomer negiah."
I was like "Wouldn't you rather the guy be guaranteed a Jewish wife, and Jewish children, as well as a continuation of his lineage? Isn't that more important than keeping shomer? I mean his kids may not end up Jewish at all."
She was like "No, we don't set people like that up"
I continued "but he has no Jewish friends, he lives in the middle of nowhere NJ, where he doesn't socialize with Jews! I mean, I want Jewish cousins!"
And she was pretty adamant about it, because she never asked about my uncle! And now he is 31, dating a shiksa, and we suspect he wants to marry her, but he fears our reaction (my mom -his sister- is probably his favorite family member).
The logic my teacher used just makes no sense to me. She does kiruv. As long as a Jew is single, they can continue on doing kiruv. If they marry a Jew, they can continue doing kiruv on them (I know a few families where only one person became frum, and they remained married, because the other side "compromised), but you're just not going to do kiruv on someone who married a non-Jew, because its inhumane to encourage divorce (should they turn frum) nor is it halachicaly permissible to encourage the spouse to convert!
Anyway, because we were so close, we used to go into long conversations about our families, and how they reacted when we decided to become frum and so on. So one day, I mentioned my uncle, who at the time was about 25. He had just broken an engagment with a shiksa the year before, and so at the time -after he went on birthright, and had decided he only wanted to marry a Jewish girl, I took it as a 'project' to find him someone (I was like 14, and 25 seemed old to me!). So when I mentioned this, I was like "OMG, Mrs., you're very into kiruv, your husband works with a lot of BT guys, which means he meets their families. So he probably knows their sisters, cousins and relatives that may not be frum, but want a Jewish guy."
So she was like "yes, we know a few girls, plus we know of many girls generally."
So I was like "OMG!!! You should totally look for someone for my uncle! He is very smart and good-looking. He's laid back! Come on Mrs. F, you must no someone!"
And so, I expected her to say something like "well, I'll keep him in mind" but what I got was totally unexpected ...
"Well, I would keep him in mind, but since he is not religious, then he is not shomer, and our policy is not to set up people who aren't religious because they may break the laws of shomer negiah."
I was like "Wouldn't you rather the guy be guaranteed a Jewish wife, and Jewish children, as well as a continuation of his lineage? Isn't that more important than keeping shomer? I mean his kids may not end up Jewish at all."
She was like "No, we don't set people like that up"
I continued "but he has no Jewish friends, he lives in the middle of nowhere NJ, where he doesn't socialize with Jews! I mean, I want Jewish cousins!"
And she was pretty adamant about it, because she never asked about my uncle! And now he is 31, dating a shiksa, and we suspect he wants to marry her, but he fears our reaction (my mom -his sister- is probably his favorite family member).
The logic my teacher used just makes no sense to me. She does kiruv. As long as a Jew is single, they can continue on doing kiruv. If they marry a Jew, they can continue doing kiruv on them (I know a few families where only one person became frum, and they remained married, because the other side "compromised), but you're just not going to do kiruv on someone who married a non-Jew, because its inhumane to encourage divorce (should they turn frum) nor is it halachicaly permissible to encourage the spouse to convert!
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
Another Rant
There has been alot on my mind lately, and so I decided to chat with one of my friends about it. We started off with a very nice conversation, and she completely seemed to understand me. It was rather fun making far-fetched analogies and comparing lives and thoughts. Then she said to me "I think you should speak to Rav X", and I'm like "what? why? what will he say?"
I dont understand why, if I have some sort of problem, be it shidduch-related, halachic, personal (parents, friends, career, family) or hashkafic (like grandma going to hell thing) I don't understand WHY I automatically need to seek guidance with a Rabbi. Why can't I just kvetch?
One of the things I have a problem with is fake people in general. I have a specific issue with the fact that modern and yeshivish people are so frikkin opposite that its almost scary to label yourself. The modern people specifically compete about who is more or less modern, while the frummies compete who is frummer.
A few years ago when the bug-in-water thing came out, alot of people I know either went out and bought filters (or put socks over their faucets), or didn't do anything at all, sat around and made fun of the whole thing. Both those people irk me. Why are you automatically driving yourself nuts buying filters? Why not go, look and see if there are bugs? Why not learn a bit about it in the newspapers before you ban tap-water, when only a few hundred years ago all the Jews used to drink from wells and the bugs were actually VISIBLE!!
I mean really now... BUGS in tap water?
Why can't people just look. Nope. No one looks. Yeshivish people blindly follow what their rabbi says, and the modern people specifically make sure NOT to do what the yeshivish people are doing. They're the kind (and I know families like this) who BELIEVE that YES there are bugs in the water, yet they don't want to buy a filter for fear they will no longer appear "modern."
Why would you NOT buy a filter if you believed there were treif non-microscopic bugs in it? You're an idiot. What are you proving by drinking bugs? You really care that much about your reputation?
So I ask my friend, why is the yeshivish guy better, for blindly buying the filter, if the modern guy blindly doesn't buy the filter? Aren't they equally as retarded?
So she says "ask the Rav, he'll tell you about the bug crisis!"
WHY DOESN"T SHE SEE THIS IS DEEPER THAN BUGS IN WATER?
Then there's the hair covering. I hate the idea of women covering hair. Especially if they cover it with a sheital. It just drives me banana's. But there are those people, who treat it as if its hard-core halacha, which its not. It is a machlokes at most. Yet, the yeshivish people treat it as halacha, and the modern people treat it as something they "choose" not to do, even if they have no idea whether or not it is halacha or minhag. Here is an interesting article I read about this. The only thing rabbi's have ever told me was "You don't want the answer so you're arguing"
No people, I want answers. Infact, it would be a heckuva lot easier for me to just blindly follow everything. My life will be void of stress and headache.
I would love it, if just one day, a Rabbi said to me "You know what, you're right, we don't know, we just THINK this is the best way" rather than be like "you're not interested."
Infact, last year I actually emailed my friends rabbi. She said he "wouldn't be the type to give you the 'your not interested answer""
And he did!! Before I even started arguing. He was like "Rachel said that you're like x,y,z" So I was like "did Rachel forget to mention that I'm also a BT, and I encourgaged my family to become frum with me? and that I go to shuirim, and that I read and learn alot? Or did Rachel conveniently forget that?"
So he opened up a bit for like 2 emails, and then was like "It's more than just the source!" So I was like "well, I want to know then what it is" So he goes "You dont, you're just saying you do!"
You know how much respect I would have had if he would have just told me "Anita, its a machlokes, we take it as a halacha because Isha's Sotah is a huge deal" ?? But no one tells me that. Because they don't want to. becuase if they tell me that, they have to admit they said that to my friends, and then if word spreads, how will their kids go to yeshiva if their father (a Rabbi) was actually honest about something that had to do with halacha?!
So anyway, I was ranting about how fake I think frum people are, and how it bothers me that I have to go on a hunt searching for whether or not things are as they seem to be, or if they're taught by some frummer elders of zion to control the masses. And she goes "Ask Rabbi X, he won't lie to you"
No, I'm sure he wont. I'm sure he beleives the answers he's feeding me. The cookie cutter answers I've been receiving from my teachers.
Why can't I rant, and be given the opportunity to have a friend tell me she "understands"? Why does she have to recommend that I seek some sort of Rabbinic help. Doesn't she realize that is exactly what is throwing me off?
I dont understand why, if I have some sort of problem, be it shidduch-related, halachic, personal (parents, friends, career, family) or hashkafic (like grandma going to hell thing) I don't understand WHY I automatically need to seek guidance with a Rabbi. Why can't I just kvetch?
One of the things I have a problem with is fake people in general. I have a specific issue with the fact that modern and yeshivish people are so frikkin opposite that its almost scary to label yourself. The modern people specifically compete about who is more or less modern, while the frummies compete who is frummer.
A few years ago when the bug-in-water thing came out, alot of people I know either went out and bought filters (or put socks over their faucets), or didn't do anything at all, sat around and made fun of the whole thing. Both those people irk me. Why are you automatically driving yourself nuts buying filters? Why not go, look and see if there are bugs? Why not learn a bit about it in the newspapers before you ban tap-water, when only a few hundred years ago all the Jews used to drink from wells and the bugs were actually VISIBLE!!
I mean really now... BUGS in tap water?
Why can't people just look. Nope. No one looks. Yeshivish people blindly follow what their rabbi says, and the modern people specifically make sure NOT to do what the yeshivish people are doing. They're the kind (and I know families like this) who BELIEVE that YES there are bugs in the water, yet they don't want to buy a filter for fear they will no longer appear "modern."
Why would you NOT buy a filter if you believed there were treif non-microscopic bugs in it? You're an idiot. What are you proving by drinking bugs? You really care that much about your reputation?
So I ask my friend, why is the yeshivish guy better, for blindly buying the filter, if the modern guy blindly doesn't buy the filter? Aren't they equally as retarded?
So she says "ask the Rav, he'll tell you about the bug crisis!"
WHY DOESN"T SHE SEE THIS IS DEEPER THAN BUGS IN WATER?
Then there's the hair covering. I hate the idea of women covering hair. Especially if they cover it with a sheital. It just drives me banana's. But there are those people, who treat it as if its hard-core halacha, which its not. It is a machlokes at most. Yet, the yeshivish people treat it as halacha, and the modern people treat it as something they "choose" not to do, even if they have no idea whether or not it is halacha or minhag. Here is an interesting article I read about this. The only thing rabbi's have ever told me was "You don't want the answer so you're arguing"
No people, I want answers. Infact, it would be a heckuva lot easier for me to just blindly follow everything. My life will be void of stress and headache.
I would love it, if just one day, a Rabbi said to me "You know what, you're right, we don't know, we just THINK this is the best way" rather than be like "you're not interested."
Infact, last year I actually emailed my friends rabbi. She said he "wouldn't be the type to give you the 'your not interested answer""
And he did!! Before I even started arguing. He was like "Rachel said that you're like x,y,z" So I was like "did Rachel forget to mention that I'm also a BT, and I encourgaged my family to become frum with me? and that I go to shuirim, and that I read and learn alot? Or did Rachel conveniently forget that?"
So he opened up a bit for like 2 emails, and then was like "It's more than just the source!" So I was like "well, I want to know then what it is" So he goes "You dont, you're just saying you do!"
You know how much respect I would have had if he would have just told me "Anita, its a machlokes, we take it as a halacha because Isha's Sotah is a huge deal" ?? But no one tells me that. Because they don't want to. becuase if they tell me that, they have to admit they said that to my friends, and then if word spreads, how will their kids go to yeshiva if their father (a Rabbi) was actually honest about something that had to do with halacha?!
So anyway, I was ranting about how fake I think frum people are, and how it bothers me that I have to go on a hunt searching for whether or not things are as they seem to be, or if they're taught by some frummer elders of zion to control the masses. And she goes "Ask Rabbi X, he won't lie to you"
No, I'm sure he wont. I'm sure he beleives the answers he's feeding me. The cookie cutter answers I've been receiving from my teachers.
Why can't I rant, and be given the opportunity to have a friend tell me she "understands"? Why does she have to recommend that I seek some sort of Rabbinic help. Doesn't she realize that is exactly what is throwing me off?
Sunday, May 4, 2008
Is my grandmother going to hell?
Lately I've been thinking about the concept of heaven/hell. I was thinking about how Jews believe in levels. And I also thought about how Jews, generally, believe that each time one does a mitzvah, they have another malach that advocates on their behalf, so that they get to a higher level, or spend less time in the other, lower level, or something like that.
Basically, what supposedly happens is that Hashem shows like a video recording of your life, and you feel ashamed, and then he sends you down to gohenim, or something like that. Again, I'm not sure, and with each person that gives a shuir on this, I get confused, and completely disinterested.
So anyway, the other day, I was thinking about my grandmother. Exclusively about her and whether or not she will go to hell. I love my grandmother dearly, and I think she is a good person, and though she isn't the only person in the family who isn't frum the thought of her eventually going to some low level in olam haba tends to bother me.
My grandma is a good lady. She isn't frum. My rabbi made a huge shuir on how if someone isn't frum, but they didn't have opportunity to learn how to be frum, they will not be punished for it, because it is not their fault; however, if they live in Brooklyn, where its super easy for them to learn, it is their fault, and they will be punished for not doing mitzhos because they chose not to learn, and they had opportunity too.
My grandma lives in Brooklyn, and she chooses not to learn. Some might say "well, you can't teach an old dog new tricks, and since your granny came from the USSR, she'll be ok", but began thinking...
1) I know people who went frum in their old age
2) Being frum isn't for everyone. As "ideal" as this may seem to the average frummy, not everyone can, nor should put themselves through a lifestyle of restrictions, and annoying frum people who compete on who can limit their food options more (those who eat only cholov yisroal, pas yisroal, kemach yoshon etc.).
3) why does an idiot, who never learned, but was "fortunate" enough to be ffb, get any schar at all, if all it is to him is blind following of a lifestyle he happened to be born into? Why does a person, who chooses to follow their lifestyle not get rewarded, just because their lifestyle happens to not be the frum one?
Then there are people who are frum who gain tons of brownie points doing mitzvahs but in reality, they aren't really good people, they're morons.
Like for example, the guys who seek prostitutes? They do countless numbers of mitzvos yet they do one thing, that stands out, that is really bad. Does Hashem give angels that may be better or worse advocates for the good deeds, based on the evil?
There are so many frum people who are simply pains in the ass. They wreek a lot of havoc, yet they're frum. Why should they go to heaven, and not my grandma? Or does my grandma go to heaven and they have no zchar at all? OR is there a balance and all the black/white BS we learn in BY and in shuirim all...well...BS?
I vote for BS, because well...B"Y has a way with scare tactics...but it still leaves me wondering, will my grandma go to hell?
Basically, what supposedly happens is that Hashem shows like a video recording of your life, and you feel ashamed, and then he sends you down to gohenim, or something like that. Again, I'm not sure, and with each person that gives a shuir on this, I get confused, and completely disinterested.
So anyway, the other day, I was thinking about my grandmother. Exclusively about her and whether or not she will go to hell. I love my grandmother dearly, and I think she is a good person, and though she isn't the only person in the family who isn't frum the thought of her eventually going to some low level in olam haba tends to bother me.
My grandma is a good lady. She isn't frum. My rabbi made a huge shuir on how if someone isn't frum, but they didn't have opportunity to learn how to be frum, they will not be punished for it, because it is not their fault; however, if they live in Brooklyn, where its super easy for them to learn, it is their fault, and they will be punished for not doing mitzhos because they chose not to learn, and they had opportunity too.
My grandma lives in Brooklyn, and she chooses not to learn. Some might say "well, you can't teach an old dog new tricks, and since your granny came from the USSR, she'll be ok", but began thinking...
1) I know people who went frum in their old age
2) Being frum isn't for everyone. As "ideal" as this may seem to the average frummy, not everyone can, nor should put themselves through a lifestyle of restrictions, and annoying frum people who compete on who can limit their food options more (those who eat only cholov yisroal, pas yisroal, kemach yoshon etc.).
3) why does an idiot, who never learned, but was "fortunate" enough to be ffb, get any schar at all, if all it is to him is blind following of a lifestyle he happened to be born into? Why does a person, who chooses to follow their lifestyle not get rewarded, just because their lifestyle happens to not be the frum one?
Then there are people who are frum who gain tons of brownie points doing mitzvahs but in reality, they aren't really good people, they're morons.
Like for example, the guys who seek prostitutes? They do countless numbers of mitzvos yet they do one thing, that stands out, that is really bad. Does Hashem give angels that may be better or worse advocates for the good deeds, based on the evil?
There are so many frum people who are simply pains in the ass. They wreek a lot of havoc, yet they're frum. Why should they go to heaven, and not my grandma? Or does my grandma go to heaven and they have no zchar at all? OR is there a balance and all the black/white BS we learn in BY and in shuirim all...well...BS?
I vote for BS, because well...B"Y has a way with scare tactics...but it still leaves me wondering, will my grandma go to hell?
Saturday, May 3, 2008
Gemach
I was reading through the Jewish Press over shabbos and I decided to read through the new feature, a list of simcha gemachs.
One of them read:
Energetic Bais Yaakov girl willing to come and enhance simchas. Call ...
I started cracking up, read it out loud to my mom, and she was like "wow,that so doesn't sound right!"
Just wanted to share :)
One of them read:
Energetic Bais Yaakov girl willing to come and enhance simchas. Call ...
I started cracking up, read it out loud to my mom, and she was like "wow,that so doesn't sound right!"
Just wanted to share :)
Thursday, May 1, 2008
fwd joke :)
The Hamodia requests to please not vote for Hillary or Obama. Hillary because they cannot put a woman in the Hamodia, and Obama becuase they cannot afford that much ink!!
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