Monday, May 17, 2010

non-Jew coworker on Jewish men

One non-Jewish lady at my office said to me "You know, back in the former Soviet Union, all of us wanted to marry Jewish guys. They were known to be the best. They worked, they didn't drink and they didn't have girlfriends... And if they did, their wife and child always came first if anything major happened."

I thought that was an amazing thing she said, and then I responded "they don't really work so much anymore."
She was like "WHAT!?"
I said "yea, its not in style for them to work, they don't work, they sit in yeshiva and learn all day, and get married, and continue to sit in yeshiva and learn all day"

She said "they can do that, but no one will want to marry them!"
I said "yea, umm... its in style for girls to want a guy like that and for her dad to provide for them"

To which my coworker responded "They're not Jewish then. Jewish men are actually hardworking." (She would know, she married a Jew)

I thought to myself "its a sad world when the non-Jew recognizes the insanity of our current culture."

11 comments:

Jessica said...

That's not the current culture of Jews as a whole. Not even the current culture of orthodox Jews as a whole... It's the culture of a specific sect of orthodox Jews, one that does not represent me (and I doubt it represents you either). Your husband works, correct? I know my husband works. My brother and brother-in-law work. My father would be working if he was able to. When my father-in-law, alav hashalom, was alive and well, he was working too. All of these men are orthodox...

frumskeptic said...

unfortunately we're the exception... many of the YOUNGer guys (father are supporting, remember?) are no longer seeking jobs or means of supporting their families on their own, but choose to be supported by others. Even many of the "working" young guys opt-out of decent careers because its bad for their yiddishket (they quit college and do some half-a$$ed work like kiruv which pays pennies) and they still require support from their parents... I find the practice repulsive, but unfortunately its common.maybe Not for me or you, but for the community as a whole its pretty common

Jessica said...

We must live in very different communities because more than 85% of men in my community have a job...
Kollel is not that common here...

frum single female said...

hmm... i bet someone will be happy to know that less non-jewish women will be chasing jewish men!

Anonymous said...

The coworker was probably referring to the Jewish men she had encountered in her life, most likely secular.
Jessica - I see what you mean.
Back when I lived in Columbus, the kollel had I think 8 members? But yeah, in the modern orthodox Jewish community just about all of the men had jobs.

Rabbi Lars Shalom said...

hi

frumskeptic said...

Jessica- Yup, totaly differnt communities.

FSF- lol, thats the bright side :)

anon- It used to be the FRUM guys had jobs too, not just the secular.

Moshe said...

Jessica, we do live in different communities. In NY and NJ, that's the standard.

Ichabod Chrain said...

Actually there's a market for Jewish guys in the shikse world. A Chinese-American nurse told me that she and her single friends liked to date Jewish guys for the same reasons OFS's co-worker said. She eventually married a Jewish lawyer. Now at work the Chinese doctors like to emphasize her married name, and take every opportunity to call her, "Mrs. ----berg."
Our local library had a book called "Boy Vey", I think, which tells shikses how to approach Jewish guys. I saw it once and haven't seen it since--don't know if that means it keeps getting checked out.

frumskeptic said...

Jessica- a girl from my grade had baby #2 this week (mazel tov yada yada)...neither of them work...he's not even in kollel... its just why should they work when the society expects parents to spport the kids

Anonymous said...

Not sure about America, but in Britain, we (Jews) find the term 'Shiksa' to be fairly repulsive. I'm Jewish, and I work my arse off 6 days a week - since when was it acceptable to not have a job and leach off others. Shocking.