Friday, July 2, 2010

Yeshiva Hypocrisy

The following is a guest post:

I don't usually like to complain or make waves, but a recent incident has made venting a necessity, as well as a need to let the public know of the admissions process of a very respected Yeshiva. Our son is supposed to go to Kindergarten in the fall, so we applied to several schools in October of 2009. One of the schools that we applied to was this respected yeshiva. We thought that we would have no problem in getting in as my husband is an alumnus and many of our friends' children go there. We were wrong. While we were contacted by and then accepted by several schools, this respected Yeshiva never bothered to reply to us. We didn't pay attention to this for awhile as we were considering other schools. However, in the end, we decided to focus on the respected yeshiva due to the high cost of tuition and after being made aware of certain incidents in the schools that we were accepted to, as well as the fact that we would have for a very expensive private bus for the first year. The respected yeshiva is the least expensive of the schools that we applied to and it is within a very easy walking distance from us. Due to the act that we never heard anything from them, we correctly assumed that we were rejected and asked our Rabbi to find out whether anything could be done for us to be admitted there. He tried and over the course of several months was told that there was simply no room. However, as I simply wasn't sure we were rejected in the first place, I finally called the Rabbi in charge of admissions and he explained the reason.:

He said that they first take all the children of their Kollel members and those with older siblings already in the school. I said that's fine, but then I pointed that after these children, we should have been one of the first to be contacted for an interview as my husband attended this school and that we applied as early as possible in October. His answer was that the list of alumni was sent to the board, who then decided who to interview based on their activity on behalf of the yeshiva and contributions to it. In other words, it didn't matter that my husband was an alumnus or that we were one of the first to apply, the reason that we were rejected is that we didn't give them enough money. Now, beside the fact that this should have nothing to do with admittance, we have contributed money to the yeshiva throughout the years and my mother in law contributes every year as well. Then to add insult to injury, this Rabbi said that there were no spaces already in January, when our Rabbi first started inquiring on our behalf. However, this is a lie as I know someone who was interviewed and accepted in January after someone spoke for them.

To say that I am angry about the entire incident is an understatement. It is time that everyone knew that these holier-than-thou types are complete hypocrites who claim and teach one thing, but really only care about money. Also, before anyone asks, we would have paid full tuition in this respected yeshiva, afterall the high tuition in the schools that we were accepted to combined with paying for an expensive private bus, would have required us to apply for scholarship which we didn't want to do.

It is also quite obvious that from now on we are not going to contribute another penny to this yeshiva."


Moshe said...

New York yeshivas are not about teaching or torah, they're about making money.

frumskeptic said...

I doubt its excluive to NY yeshivas.

Moshe said...

Right, let me amend that to Tri-State.

Mighty Garnel Ironheart said...

Why do you think their tuition is so low in the first place? Because some really well-off alumni have been making sure the bills are paid in return for easy entrance for their children/grandchildren.

Ichabod Chrain said...

I don't live in NYC but from what I read, I understand that many yeshivas are in financial trouble. Are you saying they aren't?

Anonymous said...

This is the author of the post.
We know many people who didn't give any money to this yeshiva and had no problems getting in last few years. And they applied months later than us.
Also, I am pretty sure that the people who were accepted in January didn't contribute much or anything to the yeshiva.
Ironheart, are you trying to say that only those who contribute a lot of money to the yeshiva have a right to attend? Is paying full tuition no longer enough for these schools? In that case, none of their Kollel members should accepted since all of them are getting a discount.
Why is it that Kollel getting a discount is acceptable, while working people who are paying full tuition who are getting the third degree?
Also, while they didn't want us because we didn't give them enough money, they still kept sending us dinner invitations. In other words, we don't want your child, but we still want you more of your money.

Lion of ZIon said...

1) running a schools costs $. a lot of it. so while it seems unfair, i'm not sure if there is really anything wrong with giving precedence to families that donate $ above paying full tuition. without those families the school would not exist.

2) on the other hand, i don't understand why you expect that the school should take into consideration your husband's role as an alumnus. that is just as unfair as preference for donors' kids. probably even more unfair.

3) i don't really understand this post. it's clear from you write that the real reason your kids was rejected has nothing to do $, because you were willing to pay full tuition and your wrote that your family has give more $ than the parents of kids who were accepted. so what do you think the real reason is?

4) "To say that I am angry about the entire incident is an understatement."

what are you so angry. you should be happy. you won't end up like all your neighbors, who a few years from now realize they sent their kids to the wrong type f school, but by then they are afraid to pull them out because of the social consequences.

Anonymous said...

To the author:

You write above
"We know many people who didn't give any money to this yeshiva and had no problems getting in last few years. And they applied months later than us.
Also, I am pretty sure that the people who were accepted in January didn't contribute much or anything to the yeshiva."

This leads to the thought that perhaps there is another reason that they are not telling you and they have some sort of p'sul in you or your husband. Did he behave while in that Yeshiva? Do you guys blend in with the community or do you stick out in a way that does not conform to what the yeshiva wants?

Also, Kollel people who cannot pay tuition get priority, leaving no room for paying people. Then they come to the paying people group begging for donations. What is wrong with this?

Anonymous said...

This the author:
Anon 12:20, We don't stand out in any way. The people who I mentioned got in are from the same community that we are.I also know people who behaved a lot worse than my husband did and their kids had no problem getting in.
Another point, even my husband did behave badly, what does it have to do with my son?
Furthermore, the school wouldn't know if we stand out or not if they never even met us. This excuse could work after the interview, not before.
Also,there is nothing wrong with asking for donations. What is wrong is saying we want your money, but we don't want your child.

AztecQueen2000 said...

And THIS is the great alternative to homeschooling that everyone wants to push on me?

Anonymous said...

To Lion of Zion:

My following comments are based on what I am reading from the author. I have no connection to the author, I do not know the entire story, nor do I know the school or community in question. I feel that your observations do not take into consideration what the author wrote at all and therefore have written my notes below.

What I understood from this post is that the author feels unfairly rejected. She feels this way based on excuses given to her from the school in question. If there was some other reason to not accept her child they should have just told her.

Also, often those who can pay full tuition will get a first go (in this situation it would seem after the Kollel guys. It seems that the school is connected to the Kollel and therefore the Kollel kids are able to get into the school before others.) It also seems that she was told that others have been given first choice interviews because they donated to the school. So based on her post, her perception is that the Kollel kids AND those who give lots of money to the school take precedence over her child. From her writings it seems the school is choosing to over look the donations of her family and her in-laws.

Lastly, the author has a right to be angry. She clearly isn't being told everything behind the scenes. While she may not need to be told everything, the school does not seem to have done her any courtesy in the way they dismissed her application and subsequent follow up.