Sunday, January 25, 2009

Do frum people believe in gd?

It seems like a no brainer- do Orthodox Jewish people believe in Gd?

many would answer "duh!"

but do they really? Based on the actions of frum Jews, how many really beleive and fear Gd, and not just fear being ostracized by their community?

I'd say only about 1/2 of today's frummies believe in Gd.

How often is it all over the news that a frummy embezzeled money? Or how often do they lie and cheat the government (Section 8, welfare etc)? How often do they take shul politics and over dramatize them to the extent that literally half the shul gets pissed?

If people beleived in Gd they wouldn't do things that are such chillul hashem. They wouldn't allow themselves to vote for Hillary Clinton just because she promised to pardon four of their criminals. Bogus nonsense. You'd think people in New Square would have morals (as they dress like pious people), but they don't. They allow for criminal behavior.

Do they believe in Gd? Doubt it, they just beleive in the power of the community. If they believed in Gd, they wouldn't vote for bozo's in exchange for their criminals to be released.

Criminals belong in prison, I don't particularly care what religion (or if) they practice.

My friend recently told me a story of something that happened in her school. The school had a tehillim session. The teachers gave out tehillim sheets. When everyone was finished saying tehillim, the teacher went around to collect the sheets. One of the girls (who is very pro-zionist/Israel) was in the middle of saying some extra tehillim for the soldiers, and then the teacher, out of anger grabbed the tehillim out of her hands.

The girl was like "what are you doing? I'm saying tehillim for my sick friend." (she lied)

The teacher was like "Oh, sorry (she returned the tehillim sheet), I thought you were saying it for something else" (Implying the wounded soldiers)

Now, if this teacher beleived in Gd, wouldn't she beleive that Gd loves all his creatures regardless of their political views on Israel? Wouldn't she beleive that Gd (if He were anti-zionist) would atleast want his sons well, regardless of where they live? Wouldn't she believe it were up to Gd to not heal their wounds and take care of their "punishment" in shamayim?

Well, if she believed in Gd, she would. But she doesn't. She believes in the power of community. She fears that if she doesn't stick to it, she'll be shunned. She doesn't care about Gd, she doesn't care if Gd is with her, she only cares that she is with half a million other bozo's who blindly follow a Rav. She just simply doesn't beleive in Gd.

People who believe in Gd don't act like dumbasses. They don't allow themselves to be part of committees who exchange human dignity for scum bags, be it in votes, or not allowing the saying of tehillim due to political differences.

Friday, January 23, 2009

Gotta Love Bureaucracy

I came home today and my mother was all excited to tell me this wonderful story, about my grandfather.

So, my grandfather is 65 and has applied for Medicare. When he received his card, it said "female" on it. So my grandfather went over to the medicare office, and was like "Umm... There's been a mistake, I'm male."

The great government bureaucrat said "There is no mistake, your SS# is filed as female, if you have a problem, you must go to the Social Security office."

My grandfather went on his merry way to the main SS office in Manhattan and was like "Dude, I'm male!"

The SS office looked him up and was like "Sir, there is no mistake it says you're female, and you're also not a legal resident of the United States."

My grandfather, who has been living here for almost 30 years, and has been a citizen for at least 20, showed them his Drivers License and his passport. He was like "I'm a citizen, how could I not be a legal resident?"

So they sent him to some other office, where everything was supposedly straightened out. In the meantime, they checked out my grandma, and she's legal, as well as female :-).

Btw...True Story.

In the meantime, I propose Gov. Patterson tax the stupid people. This way, either one of two things happen

1- People feel the burden of the tax and stop being stupid (which may not help the NY budget, but will help benefit society)


2- NY will prosper, with a never-ending supply of money. Then other states will follow. Once we get hick states, that's it... the US will never have to worry about financial issues.

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Obama's Inaugration

Obama's inauguration was today, and what do we have to show for it?

170 million dollars in spending, with no crazy liberals complaining. When Bush took office and his spending was not even half this amount, all the crazy liberals went crazy, "It's a recession, how could you spend so much?" And now, we are supposedly in the worst economic crisis since the Great Depression, and the liberals are in their private Jets, simultaneously crying about the crazy conservatives who drive SUV's who don't take their bikes to work.

What else? He is the first ever elected president with a political scandal before he even made it into office.

Yay for the country :-/.

Not saying *he* is responsible for anything that had anything to do with Blagojevich, but he definitely should've condemned the bozo, not been like "We have one president at a time" on like every issue ever presented.

But whatever, let's not lead this into a political discussion. I'd like to share random dumb things I've heard in reference to the Inauguration.

1- At a wedding one of my friends said "OMG, the country just elected a Muslim into the white house! Watch him get sworn in on a Quran" (I heard similar type from at least 3 other people since).

- I wonder if anyone was shocked that he didn't actually get sworn in on a Quran.

2- After the Inauguration, one lady started talking about how the stock market plummeted while Obama was speaking. So this other lady goes "I thought people liked him!"

No sweety, its the people who *don't* actually have anything to lose that like him.

Same lady goes "I'm sure it will get better, he has a lot of hope."

That's right...Hope!

Why don't you just sing the HaTikva. Seriously! HOPE can get us through anything *rollseyes*

That's right. I can hope for money, and then it will appear... why does this sound freakishly like a kollel nation? The few rich people will support everyone, while the system goes completely bankrupt?

And you know what, I would love this guy to succeed, I truly would. My success, depends a lot on the success of this country, and this country depends on Obama's success (kill me now!).

If he doesn't succeed, well took a Carter to get a Reagan.

Pray people, pray.

P.S... isn't Moshiach supposed to come now?

Monday, January 19, 2009

What are geese?

On Friday I was listening in on a conversation about the miracle plane landing on the Hudson River in NY.

One lady was saying how the whole thing happened because of birds getting into the engine.

Another lady at my office says "Really, it was birds? So it wasn't geese?"

I'm curious what she thinks geese are.

Sunday, January 18, 2009

The age old question goes "Can Gd create a boulder so big that He Himself cannot move it?"

It's supposed to be the question that stumps the believer, because if Gd is an omnipotent being, than He should never be challenged by anything, not even a huge boulder. Yet, if He cannot create a boulder then He *is* infact limited and no longer all powerful.

Here goes the modern day, post-Idiocracy question,

"Can Gd create a being so stupid, that Gd Himself cannot grasp it's stupidity"

And my belief is "yes, Gd can" simply because Gd is a good being and He supposedly allows people to have free choice.

If Gd exists (and I happen to beleive He does) then I really hope that Moshiach is seriously on his way, because I fear for the survival of normal frummy-hood (not that there is much left) if we continue on our path of reproducing in full-speed, while not-educating our kin in anything other than how to cheat the system in using Section-8, welfare, food stamps, WIC and so on.

Frum people are not here to survive on instinct, we're not animals, we're here to survive on intelligence and education, and a bit of tradition. "Cheating the system" implies that we only have one system, the problem is, us Jews are kicked out every few generations, and our system changes. We can't rely on cheating systems to survive, we need to learn and educate ourselves... yet we don't.

We're stupid. Instead of educating ourselves by investing in good yeshiva education (both "secular" -math/logic, sciences as well as "Jewish") we focus our efforts on turning people frum, who probably should just not be frum.

Think about it, if someone is born frum, their basis to remain frum is probably more solid than some hobo that became frum because they saw pretty silverwear on shabbos (come on! buy a set of silverwear and start friday night meals in a secular fashion! if that made you frum, you're fickle).

I just don't get it. We have a parnassa crisis which causes the tuition crisis. If instead of investing money towards turning people frum, we spent it to KEEP education we already have going (help the schools out, so the tuition crisis would no longer be a crisis), we'd have a more stable frum foundation, amongst the FFB's and the BT's who didn't have their emotions messed with to turn frum.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

what is loshon hara?

I never really delved into learning the halachos behind loshon hara, but I do remember a few things I learned in HS:

1. It is not loshon hara when it is about shidduchim.

2. It is not loshon hara if someone is telling on someone who is cheating/lying or can be damaging towards someone else's business, parnassa or community.

So... with the first one, I don't really have anything to say, because that makes sense, but with the second, there are many morons that just *don't* get this halacha. They're stupid and they judge people too favorably. Therefore, they continue to let the damaging person continue in his bad ways, because they don't seem to grasp that he is in fact harmful to them. One can go on and on telling them about how the said person is bad for them, and damaging, but they just won't listen to you.

There is a halacha that says "Don't stand idly by when the blood of your brother is being spilled"

But when you start saying "dude, he's about to stab you" and they don't want to hear it because it's "loshon hara" are you supposed to go on and on repeating yourself like a broken record? Or are you supposed to stand idly by, point the finger and be like "hahaha, jackass, I warned you!" (I'm so one to do that too :))

Well... by halacha, or my interpretation of everything I learned "YES! go on and on repeating yourself!"

In fact, it happened in the navi (can't remember which), someones was told "dude, they're gonna attack you" and they didn't believe him, because it was accepting "loshon hara" and they got attacked.

The problem is, a lot of people turn everything into personal matters. They think that when you complain about someone, then it's personal. It's *not* always personal. In fact, most of the time, the person really *is* a douche bag.

Many fellow people choose to ignore the obvious (douche bag's presence) just because they choose to consider it loshon hara, or are just blinded by warnings because of money/prestige insentive. But shouldn't you accept the "lashon hara" because it will harm you and being cautious is a form of u"shmar nafshecha" (watching after your life)?.

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Things that should NOT be taught literally

My sister goes to a B"Y wannabe school (meaning, they pretend to be all frum, but the students actually care to pursue higher education - college). One of the things the teachers do, is they give over information normal people would not take literally, but give it as literal. Even if one learns under the premise of Gd being an omnipotent being, some of the things they teach are just beyond any rationale.

The other day my sisters Yedeot Luach (a total waste of time, they learn the depth behind the Jewish calendar) teacher, brought in a medrash that said "That Avraham's kidney's acted as his two Rabbonim." She expanded on it, and said that it means that instinct comes from the kidney's.

Bravo!! Why is this lady allowed to teach? Maybe she'll say that the expression "Gut reaction" proves this midrash?

The same teacher last year taught my sister Jewish History and Parsha. In the Parsha class this teacher explained how everything in Torah is to be taken literally, so my sister under her breath mumbled how Parshas Haezinu was a poem, all simile and metaphor. Anyway, her point was to prove that when it says, Eretz Zvas Chalav U'Dvash, it literally means a land flowing with milk and honey. The teacher brought in a bunch of examples from the Gemorah about people who were knee deep in fig juice/honey.

I don't think I need a conclusion. I firmly beleive that I conveyed my message already. lol.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Field Trip

A friend of mine who is a senior in HS was taken on a field trip to Touro/Lander College.

Her school happens to be on a crusade against all colleges, saying things like; Ivy League schools are not at all any better than regular schools, they're just "brand names" and you pay extra for the name, YU is for people who pretend to be frum, but aren't really, just like to think they are, while CUNY is goyish, and so one may as well already go to Touro.

Since her school is full of people who either aren't frum or are pretty modern, from the realistic standpoint, advocating Touro is better than discouraging all colleges (because then the students may listen), so the school made a field trip.

Anyway, while she was there, we were texting back and forth, making sarcastic comments.

Then she texts me and says "One good thing about Touro."

I go "nu?"

And she says "Flatbush guys right across the street"

And I go "why would you want a HS guy when you're in college?"

And she says "To solve the shidduch crisis"

I started literally lmao. I was laughing out loud.

Anyway, she was laughing while at Touro, and she told her friend why, and her friend was all like "what? You better stop, they won't want to accept girls from our school."

To which we replied "that'll be a mitzvah." :-)

Anyway, she texted me later on in the day to say those bozo teachers she has were all talking about its better to choose SCAS over Kingsborough.

Now...I'm not fan of ANY Touro divisions, but SCAS is like dumbass of the dumbass of colleges.

Why do frum people feel that being stupid will perpetuate their lifestyle? If more of them were educated we wouldn't have a tuition crisis, a shidduch crisis (I don't believe in this disproportion in #'s, its a matter of refusing to date to prevent having to meet morons and in turn end up losing respect for all mankind) or a parnassa crisis.

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Sleeping Beauty

My sister received a Sleeping Beauty DVD for Chanukkah (we love Disney movies, and as soon as Beauty and the Beast comes out of the vault again, I'm so going to buy it!). Since we haven't seen Sleeping Beauty in a really long time, we decided to watch it right away. As I was watching it, I found it really funny how similar that movie was to the typical frummy society.

First part of the movie, you learn that the entire kingdom was invited to the celebration of the birth of the princess. Then it is known that the the newborn princess was betrothed to the prince of some other kingdom. Typical frum move, get a shidduch early, and ensure the assets (in the case of the movie, the kingdoms) remain in good alliance and in good hands.

Aside from being betrothed, three good fairies came down and started giving the baby a "bracha." Two of them managed to give the bracha, and then the evil fairy, or the "mistress of all evil" (aka Maleficent) as she described herself, appeared and said how she was not invited while the entire kingdom was. This made her upset (even though she refused to admit it, but it was clear), and she gave the baby an equivalent of an ayin hara (what a frummy would call it), and said the baby would die before she makes it to her 16th birthday, by pricking her finger on the spindle of the spinning wheel.

Luckily for Aurora (the baby's name), the third good fairy was able to "better" the situation just given to the new princess. The third fairy said the prick wouldn't lead to a death, but a deep slumber that could only be awaken by a true loves kiss.

So, the next day, or right away (couldn't really tell) King Stefan (the baby's father) ordered all the spinning wheels in the kingdom to be burned!

I found that ridiculously humorous, for many reasons. The first because that is such a typical frum move, to just ban the object, instead of institute safety precautions. I mean, this movie supposedly took place around the 14th century, these people *needed* those spinning wheels almost as much as we need the internet today. Without the wheel, they had no fabric or clothes. They literally needed it...leave it to the kooky old-fashioned nut jobs to ban something necessary in the name of their paranoia. So typical frum. That scene reminded me so much of the Rabbi's banning the net and completely ignoring the necessity of the instrument.

Hmm...while the movie took place in the 14th century and was also a work of fiction, I can understand the concept of the king banning and burning the spinning wheels, but the fact that Rabbi's in today's day and age act like that, in *real* life (TV's, net, and sheitl bans etc) I just cannot get over it.

Anyway, the three fairies ended up just sneaking out with the baby in the middle of the night, and raising her as a peasant girl. They lived in a cottage in the middle of the forest. She was raised, not as Aurora, but as Briar Rose. She was pretty much banned from talking to strangers, because then she may be found and all that.

The girl got by, because she was able to talk to the animals. In real life, frummies would probably ban the girl from talking to anybody as well. And in real life, the girl wouldn't have animals, and she'd question why she was living with three aunts in some weird cottage, and she'd probably escape into the village...

Just like in real-life frummies have a high escape rate due to all the frivolous bans.

I really need to stop reading so much into Disney movies.

Monday, January 5, 2009


I've been having alot of discussions with people lately, and I've come to realize that many frum Jews are full of crap. Most of them are unbelievably insecure about their religion and they justify their own stupidity by pointing fingers at the goyim. "OMG, goyim do xyz as well why don't you talk about the goyim?"

Well I'll tell you why, cuz I'm NOT a goy...

Baruch ata Hashem Elokenu melech ha olam sh'lo asani goy!



Sunday, January 4, 2009


About a week ago I was at my friends wedding. The kallah was litvish, the chosson was lubavich. Both are BTs. She has been frum for about 6 years, while he was frum for about a year. He found religion through Chabad so he adapted their minhaggim.

Before they got engaged she told him that she hates beards, and since most chabad guys have beards, she told him she specifically didn't want him to keep the beard thing. He said ok.


I told a friend of mine that story a few days after the wedding, and the friend told me the following:

I had a friend who got engaged to a chabad guy, and he told her the same thing, that he wouldn't grow a beard. Under the chupa he told her that he made a promise that he would grow a beard, and he would have to stand by it, and so he would not shave, and he will grow a beard.

I flipped out about that. I found it repulsive that someone could do something like that. I probably woulda just shaved him in the middle of the night, its not like *I* had promised not to shave the beard, he had.

So anyway, after I flipped out, the friend said to me

Well, she told me while they were dating that she couldn't have kids, and he told her "If I'm meant to have kids, I'm only meant to have them with you."

Sure enough I calmed down, said "awwww" (or similar) and decided that it was ok that she didn't just attack him with a razor one night.

Anyway, now they have kids. Can't remember how many though. But I just thought that was cute. And I hope my friend's husband didn't do that!

Thursday, January 1, 2009


I always do this, every year I watch the ball drop down in Times Square (on TV), and I think "what a bunch of idiots, standing out all day in the cold, just to watch a ball fall."

Tourists bring in alot of money into the city. The paper said $30 billion for 2008.

Bring on the dumb tourists!!! The more money they spend here, the less money I pay in taxes!! :-)

If they want to wait outside when its 18 degrees, so be it, the stupid spend alot. :-)

My only problem with "New Years" is that our new neighbors seem to have some sort of "gun shot" sounding form of entertainment. And its horribly annoying.