I was in the copy room at work and my coworker (who isn't Jewish) decided to start a convo with me on how happy she was that the company closes early on Friday's (due to the company being owned by frummies). She also started talking about shabbos, and how she has no idea how I keep it. She was going on and on about how she would never be able to commit to not being allowed to do anything on Saturday's. The conversation jumped around from one frummy topic to another, and I found myself saying something like:
"better religious than slutty"
After I said it, I was shocked. I was like "oh wow, high school really got to me"
I was really surprised with the statment. I was more surprised with myself that I was able to have it leave my mouth. I was one of those "rebellious" types in HS. I ignored all my "hashkafa" teachers because I knew they were full of it. I also debated with the teachers when I did pay attention, because they usually were full of it, and I liked to point it out to them.
I had one teacher tell us not to worry about regents "because Public School kids were meant to pass them"...and let me tell you, she KNEW I was from public school. These teachers told us things like "if you date too long you will have a greater chance of getting a divorce." Or "if you aren't shomer then guy's wont respect you and will never marry you " [because of the "why buy the cow if you get the milk for free" thing? ]
HS used to really upset me, and I really thought that I was safe from the brainwashing. Unfortunately, from the statment I made at work, I was not as safe as I thought. Which scares me very much. Oy
12 comments:
Oy mein gott in himmel!!!!!!!!!! *shakes head*
Sorry hun, but your HS isn't a brainwashing factory, and it's ok if you took some of their hashkafot with you. Brainwashing involves something like Chinese water torture and I have a feeling they didn't do that :) or am I wrong?
oh no deary. Here I am, a girl, that was not at all religious. Not at all slutty either pre-religion. and there i was saying THAT! something went totally wrong with my brain in HS. believe me!
Not only that, but until you experienced MY hs...oy...
I had a paper written up (that a bunch of stupid girls took seriously) that the HS was trying to make us crazy (the idea came from the book serious "Losing Christina" by Caroline B. Cooney). Basically the paper was a letter to a law firm asking them to help sue my school for treating us in this way... rather funny. I can't rememeber where I put it!!
ANywayz, yea, it really was a brainwashing facility.
You jsut gave me an idea for another post. I will call it "Why my HS raelly was a brainwashing factory" ... give me a few days, hopefully i'll have it up :)
book series*******
Sometimes that happens that words slip out without thinking first. It can be about anything, it doesn't necessarily mean anyone is at fault. I had a neighbor who had moved in over a year ago, and then there's someone else on the block who's an old lady, and every time she saw her she would ask her if she's knew on the block, and my neighbor would always tell her that yea she's new and she moved in a little while ago. Then one time, she slipped, and when she was asked if she was new, she said "You know you ask me that every week". She felt really bad after, but it wasn't anyone's fault really.
Anyways, The stuff you said your HS taught, my HS taught too, and I would say I agree with them, they make sense. For some strange reason I can defend my HS's logic very well. I wouldn't call it brainwashing, its just you absorbed it subconsciously so that it plays out in every day life, which can be a good thing. I wouldn't call what you said a bad thing necessarily, it shouldn't really offend her that much cause even within the non-Jews they have a perception of what slutty is, and even if they don't have religion they do have some sense of belief. Like when someones sick they know its in some power above to heal, or stuff like that. So the co-worker hopefully was understanding then.
Babysitter: I don't think the coworker was offended at all. I don't think my statement was bad because I was worried I may have offended her, I thought it was bad just because of the fact that it is such an awful generalization to make about such a GIGANTIC group of people.
Like How can I say "religion" vs. "sluttiness" there are soooo many other things one can be. its just so messed up that it came out of me.
And the schools really are brainwashing. IF i said THAT, thats hardcore brainwashing...its so wrong for teachers to teach it, and teach it in such a way that it got that ingrained in me that it slipped off my tongue like that.
ahh I see now, I misunderstood, that makes more sense now, your right in that case of that over generalization.
My high school was also a brainwashing facility. When people see me, they think I escaped unharmed (I'm in college, and I live life according to a hashkafa totally different than my HS's), but I know I was brainwashed. During my years of HS, I honestly thought I wasn't Jewish. The way my HS presented its hashkafa, I was duped into believing it was the ONLY way to live a Jewish life, and that I was an apikores for thinking otherwise. Thank God I learned that there are other hashkafos. I look forward to reading your post about how your HS tried to brainwash you.
(P.S. I only stumbled across your blog recently, but I've thoroughly enjoyed the few posts I've read. Kudos and props.)
Am I brainwashed because I thought that was the most hilarious thing you could have possibly said at that moment?
Personally, I see nothing wrong with that statement. Its not like you actually think that the exact opposite of being religious is being slutty. Its more like some people who aren't religious are slutty, so I'd rather be religious than be slutty. But, you were the one who said it, so I can't claim that that's what you were thinking when you said it... since really only you know what you were thinking when you said it.
Either way, hilarious!
ONe more thing...
I went to your school :), though I went to the elementary school, but the hashkafos are the same.
If your HS was brainwashing, then what do you say about mine???!!
I agree with "the babysitter" that what you were taught was absorbed subconsciously. It's like when I sit through one of my principal's speeches and much later on I'll start spouting whatever she taught us, no matter if I paid attention or not...
TTY and we can pow-wow it out later ;)
Based on last two comments; we are affected by EVERYTHING we see hear and experience -I found myself in many different situations at times, and I find myself a little influenced by all of them (I was in Salt Lake City once- I seriously left a little more Mormon!)
Jersey: frum schools are terrible. Oy. I hope to have the post up soon...I have a few things due next week so its taking longer than i had planned!!! Glad you enjoyed my blog...:). thanx for reading it!!
Jessica: NOT FUNNY!!!!! ok..maybe a bit. I woulda laughed if a friend said that. THe thing is, is that I really hated HS because they constantly said things like that, and it bothered me that thats how they hope to keep people frum... its just so bad.
Oh...and brainwashed people don't think. lol...kinda the point. :). I was brainwashed into saying that after a certain key word, rather than actually Think before I speak so that something that can potentially be truly offensive not come out!! Imagine if this women were the type to get offended?? How bad would that be?
OY!!
lol, and yet you use the world "OY"
Where does that come from?
For some weird reason when something happens, like something spills, or stuff like that, I got in the habit of saying "gevaldik" which doesn't even make sense cause it doesn't fit. I think its supposed to be "Oy Gevalt". But from one of my profs I had he kept saying gevaldik every minute, so it went in to me. He would be like, "ok, everyone understand, we can move on, gevaldik!)
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