When I was 4 and my sister was a baby, we had a live-in babysitter. The lady was from Kiev, Ukraine. She used to live next door to my father when he was growing up over there. My father used to be best friends with her son, and he was pretty close to the lady as well. When my mom was expecting my sister, my parents decided to hire that lady to be my sister's babysitter. So they flew her in.
The lady was not very bright. And according to my parents, she used to annoy me all the time (imagine that, at 4 I was already ticked by human stupidity). Basically my parents said she and I didn't get along. One day, she wanted me to do something that I really didn't want to do. She probably wanted me to clean up a mess I made or something, so we got into a fight, and I screamed:
"I'm going to call Mama and Papa and tell them to put you on a plane and send you back to the Ukraine!!"
apparently thats one story that all the relatives and coworkers heard.
Over Simchas Torah my favorite little young boy in the whole wide world, who was 4 at the time, got into a fight with some other little kids at shul. He got annoyed and said:
"I'm going to kill you and then sell you on ebay"
I told that story to all my friends and family :). What a mushy kid! (yes his parents punished him!)
When I was babysitting that kid, he manipulated me out of a cookie. I used to pick him up from his carpool, and then take him up to his apartment, where I would feed him and play with him. One day (happened to be the last day I babysat), he had A LOT of cookies in his apartment. Many different varieties. So he asked me for a cookie. I gave him one, and then he begged me for another kind as well. So I told him he could only have half of the one I gave him if he wanted both types. So he agreed. He finished the half-cookie, then he went and ate the other cookie (which was small- so he had it whole).
He started begging me for more cookies. And ofcourse I said no. I told him, after his salad, he can have more. He didn't like that, and so he kept on begging. Finally, he got fed up, he went into the tin, and took out one of the cookie packages- two came in a pack. He handed me the package, and said "Here, you have it"
I was like "No, I don't want, I don't like this kind of cookie"
So he was like "I'm sharing, you have to have, I'm being a good boy"
Since he had a good point, and I had laryngitis, I was in no mood to fight, so I opened the cookies, and was about to take one, when he said
"Can you share with me?"
and he said that with this adorable face, with his cute big blue eyes staring at me, drooping from his fake saddness.
And I couldn't resist so I shared the cookie.
My moms best freind was on a plane. Her baby daughter was on her lap, and her 4-year-old daughter was sitting next to her. Next to them sat a guy, who the baby happened to be staring at. The guy on the plane started talking to the baby "Wow, what are you looking at cutie?" And he started playing with her. The four-year-old was like
"Maybe shes looking at you wondering why you so fat?!"
And her mom was so embarrassed. Apologized like 100 times. Then when we heard the story, the mother was like "Yes, so now we taught her, that she shouldn't call people fat, but plump" So we started laughing, imagining how little of a difference it would have made had she said:
"Maybe she's looking at you wondering why you so plump"
Anyway, I was in a good mood, and I thought these stories were adorable...I LOVE kids. :)