I was in a kiruv program at HS (I believe I mentioned this before) that was part of a "regular" all girls school. The program was very small, and we became extremely close to many of our teachers. To this day I keep in touch with three of them.
Anyway, because we were so close, we used to go into long conversations about our families, and how they reacted when we decided to become frum and so on. So one day, I mentioned my uncle, who at the time was about 25. He had just broken an engagment with a shiksa the year before, and so at the time -after he went on birthright, and had decided he only wanted to marry a Jewish girl, I took it as a 'project' to find him someone (I was like 14, and 25 seemed old to me!). So when I mentioned this, I was like "OMG, Mrs., you're very into kiruv, your husband works with a lot of BT guys, which means he meets their families. So he probably knows their sisters, cousins and relatives that may not be frum, but want a Jewish guy."
So she was like "yes, we know a few girls, plus we know of many girls generally."
So I was like "OMG!!! You should totally look for someone for my uncle! He is very smart and good-looking. He's laid back! Come on Mrs. F, you must no someone!"
And so, I expected her to say something like "well, I'll keep him in mind" but what I got was totally unexpected ...
"Well, I would keep him in mind, but since he is not religious, then he is not shomer, and our policy is not to set up people who aren't religious because they may break the laws of shomer negiah."
I was like "Wouldn't you rather the guy be guaranteed a Jewish wife, and Jewish children, as well as a continuation of his lineage? Isn't that more important than keeping shomer? I mean his kids may not end up Jewish at all."
She was like "No, we don't set people like that up"
I continued "but he has no Jewish friends, he lives in the middle of nowhere NJ, where he doesn't socialize with Jews! I mean, I want Jewish cousins!"
And she was pretty adamant about it, because she never asked about my uncle! And now he is 31, dating a shiksa, and we suspect he wants to marry her, but he fears our reaction (my mom -his sister- is probably his favorite family member).
The logic my teacher used just makes no sense to me. She does kiruv. As long as a Jew is single, they can continue on doing kiruv. If they marry a Jew, they can continue doing kiruv on them (I know a few families where only one person became frum, and they remained married, because the other side "compromised), but you're just not going to do kiruv on someone who married a non-Jew, because its inhumane to encourage divorce (should they turn frum) nor is it halachicaly permissible to encourage the spouse to convert!